It’s my birthday and I’ll cry if I want to, cry if I want to, cry if I want to….

Ginger ale is a remarkable thing.

I woke up this morning sick, my throat hurting, my insides roiling, my brain full of cotton. I tried to get it together and go to school, I even made it to the car, where Monacita was kind enough to offer to drive. And then I turned tail and ran back in the house. I slept until noon. Araceli (Monacita’s roommate) came home and offered me a can of ginger ale she happened to have when she found out I was sick. I took her up on it because, well, it was really sweet of her, and I figured it’d be worth a try…

And damned if it hasn’t slightly settled my stomach. And the cold liquid feels incredible on my throat. What a remarkable thing.

hurrah!

Anyway, that’s about all I know at this point…

… oh, and Astound on Saturday Woot!

fuckin stupid, goddamned awful day. There is not enough profanity in the world to fully express how I’m feeling right now. I think it would best be expressed by slamming someone across the upper legs with a wooden baseball bat. There’s a good chance it wouldn’t break anything, but it’d hurt like a motherfucker. I don’t want to kill or disfigure anyone, I just want them to share the pain.

So, for $700, (fuckfuckfuckFUCK) it looks like I’ll get my truck back today. Maybe in time for therapy. Meanwhile, my wells fargo brokerage account no longer shows $3000 just sitting there waiting, yet my checking account still shows a balance of -$250. That asshole promised me the money would be avalible by Wed. WEDNESDAY! It’s fucking Thursday! And I have $700 worth of repairs to pay for! And Monacita and I are going to have to sit around on our asses in a fucking repair shop while we wait for them to finish my truck. And I’m going to have to ask my lab partner to go out of her way to drive us there, unless we decide to walk.

At least we’d only have to walk down the hill. Which is a damn sight better than up. It would also kill some time so we don’t have to spend the whole time waiting.

I’m not even going to get into my Chemistry midterm grade. That’s just too depressing. To say nothing of tomorrow’s Calculus midterm.

Just shoot me. Just shoot me now.

Or at least hand me a baseball bat.

I wanna be… anarchy.

Anarchy for the city!

*sigh*

discouraged, and a tad lonely.

Tuesdays and Thursdays I’m too busy to think about anything other than chemistry, but Mondays and Wednesdays leave just too much time for reflection. I am still having trouble with calculus, and the fact that I am here for 8 hours, 7 of which are spent in isolation in the library just isn’t working well for me.

Part of the problem is the fact that I don’t really take calculus all that seriously, and I have to force myself to attend lecture. I don’t have this problem with chemistry at all. I’m not entirely sure what the difference is, but I suspect it’s because the math lecture is so short… the lab gives the chemistry class a bit more oomph in my mind. But then again I’ve always taken lab more seriously. I like it, and it’s something I can do fairly well.

Oh well, enough bitching, I need to pack up and get my ass to calculus. I don’t have all my homework to turn in, but that doesn’t matter. Attending the lecture is what matters. No excuses.